230. How to Be a Mentally Tough Dancer Using The Power of the Four Cs

[00:00:00] Hello and welcome to Passion for Dance. I'm your host, Dr. Chelsea, and it's my mission to create happier, more successful dancers through positive mental skills. I have covered mental toughness and confidence before, but I have never really outlined the four skills that make a dancer mentally tough. When you say, I want to be a mentally tough dancer, or I want my team to be more mentally tough, what are you really looking for?

If you listened last week, you heard from some coaches who said things like a mentally tough dancer is the dancer who won't give up after a mistake and can recover. Or the dancer who follows through on all of their commitments even when they don't feel like it. Those are both great examples, and the conversation with coaches last week inspired me to sit down and talk about what it really means to be mentally tough.

Does it mean that you never show emotion? Does it mean you ignore your emotions when you feel nervous or pushed down? Any pain or discomfort? Of course not. Real mental toughness isn't about shutting down [00:01:00] your emotions or ignoring the challenges and pain. It's about being able to perform at your best, even when things aren't perfect, when you're stressed, tired, or things are not going your way.

There's a framework I love that breaks this down beautifully. It's called the Four C's of Mental Toughness, created by researchers at A QR International. The four C's stand for control, commitment, challenge, and confidence. And when you develop all four, you become the kind of dancer who can stay calm under pressure, stay motivated when things get hard, and perform with consistency no matter what happens around you.

And if you're looking to build mental toughness, I'm gonna share some strategies today. But I would also love for you to check out my free competition confidence checklist. It's a quick practical guide that helps you prepare mentally for your next performance, and it fits perfectly with the four C's model I'm sharing today.

You can grab it at passion for dance podcast.com/checklist or find the link in the show notes. Okay. Let's walk through each of the four C's and see what [00:02:00] they look like for dancers. I'll share some ideas for how you can start strengthening each aspect of mental toughness in practice right now.

Welcome to Passion for Dance. I'm Dr. Chelsea, a former professional dancer, turn sport psychologist, and this podcast is for everyone in the dance industry who want to learn actionable strategies and new mindsets to build happier, more successful dancers. I know what it feels like to push through the pain, take on all the criticism, and do whatever it takes to make sure the show will go on.

But I also know that we understand more about mental health and resilience than ever before, and it's time to change the industry for the better. This podcast is for all of us to connect, learn, and share our passion for dance with the world.

The first C is control. Control is all about how much you believe you have power over your life and emotions. There are two parts to this life control and emotional control. Life control is asking, do you believe you can shape what happens in your life? For a lot of younger dancers especially, [00:03:00] they often don't feel any control.

Parents, teachers, coaches are all telling them what to do all day every day, but mentally tough dancers develop a sense of control over their life outcomes. You may have heard me share one of my favorite mental toughness mantras. Control the controllables. It's essential that we learn to focus on what is in our control, and especially as a young person who is often not in control of much, it's important to develop the belief that you have influence over things that are in fact in your control. So it's about noticing what is in your control and then knowing that you can make a difference there.

The second aspect of control is emotional control asks, can you stay calm and focused when things don't go to plan? For dancers this shows up all the time. You walk into practice and your coach changes the formation again, or you get tough feedback from a judge, or you're standing backstage watching the team in front of you and your heart is pounding out of your chest.

A mentally tough dancer has learned how to stay [00:04:00] composed. They don't crumble when they get corrections or when something unexpected happens. Instead, they think, okay, this is in my control. I can be the dancer I need to be in the moment, and if something goes wrong, I can reset and go again. The truth is, the less control we feel, the more stressed we become.

And in dance there are so many things out of our control. Judges opinions, music malfunctions, other dancer's mistakes. So the skill here is learning to focus your energy on what is in your control. Your effort, your focus, and your actions and reactions.

If you wanna build a sense of control this week, here's a quick reflection you can try.

After each practice, ask yourself, what did I choose today? What felt outside my control? And how can I redirect my focus tomorrow toward what I can control for some dancers? Thinking about what did I choose today? My leave them with a [00:05:00] blank stare, but remind them you can control your effort. Did you choose full effort? When coach said last time, knowing it wasn't really the last time, how did you react? What did you choose to focus on during the day? So, pay attention. What did I choose? What felt outside my control? And how can I redirect my focus towards what I can control?

And if you struggle with the emotional control side, which honestly most of us do, start practicing your response to mistakes. The small things. For example, after a mistake, give yourself a moment to reset. Take a deep breath, roll your shoulders back, start fresh. That simple act of pausing and choosing your response helps build emotional control over time. If you need more help here, I talk a lot about emotional awareness and control in episodes 1 94 to 1 96, so you can go check it out there.

Control doesn't mean you are always in control and pretending that you don't feel frustrated or nervous at [00:06:00] times. Control means acknowledging those emotions but not letting them drive the show. You maintain control and stay focused and hardworking in the moment.

The second C is committed. Commitment is about doing what it takes to reach your goals. Even when motivation fades , it's about reliability. The dancer, your team can count on. When you say you're going to do something, you actually follow through. A lot of coaches constantly work on their teams accountability. They want dancers to show their commitment to the team and follow through on their promises.

And granted a lot of dancers are really naturally driven people. We wouldn't train so many hours a week if we didn't care. But commitment gets tested when our competition season gets tough. Those moments when choreography isn't clicking, when your body is sore and tired, or you're not seeing results as fast as you hoped. That's when we need mental toughness to show up. The [00:07:00] mentally tough dancer keeps showing up day after day, not because it's easy, but because they've made a commitment.

To make this concrete commitment is best supported by good goal setting. I often encourage teams who are competitive or have big goals and dreams to set that big outcome goal.

Something like, we will perform our best cleanest routine at nationals, or we'll make top five at X competition. Have those big goals and dreams, put 'em on the vision board. But commitment really comes down to the process goals along the way. Those small goals that are in your control that will help you get there.

Something like I will do visualization three times a week, or as a team, we will achieve X number of full outs by February 1st. The idea is focusing on those smaller process goals.

What are you doing every day and every week to work towards that bigger goal? It's [00:08:00] easier to make a commitment on that smaller level, and it's how those days add up that show the commitment to your season. Those smaller commitments are the habits you need that build mental toughness because commitment needs to get out of the early team meetings and summertime conversations when everyone is excited and less stressed. It's easy to talk about it then, but commitment is about discipline and follow through when the season gets tough.

But I also wanna note something important here. Being overly committed is a problem and can backfire. If you take on too much, never rest. Or you tie all of your self-worth to dance and competition achievement.

That's not mental toughness. That's burnout waiting to happen. And as I'm saying this, I'm thinking I will probably dive more into commitment in the future because it is an important Goldilocks kind of balance of strong commitment without going too far. But for now, make sure your goals are realistic, your effort is [00:09:00] sustainable that you take time to rest and recover because consistency beats intensity every time.

The third C is challenge. This is related to the idea of growth mindset, if you're familiar with that, but it goes deeper and dancers and dance teachers don't always apply growth mindset research correctly. So let's talk about it.

The idea of challenge is all about how you see pressure or difficulty, or if you perceive change as scary. Do you see change as a threat? Is pressure something scary and negative, or is pressure an opportunity? Is that really hard choreography, something that helps you grow?

Mentally tough dancers lean into the challenge. They understand that discomfort is part of the growth. So it's not just the broad growth mindset idea of be positive, it's that you actually lean into the hard, that you understand the [00:10:00] discomfort is necessary. Maybe you got moved to the back of the formation, or your coach added a trick to your routine, you can't do yet, and you think, oh, why does coach hate me?

Or they never believe in me, or the mentally tough dancer can think this is my opportunity to improve and to show I can adapt. That's challenge focus. You're reframing obstacles as opportunities. Here's a few ways you can train this challenge mindset.

Take on one stretch challenge each week. Pick something that pushes you, makes you a little uncomfortable. Maybe it's working on your weaker side, like drilling more on the left than the right, or taking a dance class in a different style that you don't usually train, or simply making a goal to take your corrective feedback without any defensiveness.

Another way you can train this is after any mistake, ask yourself, what's the opportunity here? What can I learn from this? [00:11:00] Small things like falling out of a turn or forgetting one count of your choreography. Why did I fall? Why did I forget that? What do I need to focus on? If you approach the mistake as, what can I learn that's leaning into the challenge rather than beating yourself up and feeling like trying again isn't worth it.

Shifting the question to what is the opportunity here helps your brain switch from shame and fear of failure to a growth mindset that leans into a challenge.

To the coaches and teachers listening, make challenge part of your culture. Ask dancers what was hard about practice and what they learned from it. Set up a challenge and normalize that growth feels uncomfortable. It might mean saying something like, okay, we're learning new competition choreography today. I don't expect you to have it perfect at the end of today's practice, this is about learning and trying. Or maybe you're in the thick of cleaning and just letting them know, okay, I'm working out a new [00:12:00] idea for this transition. It might feel challenging for a while. Just keep trying. Let's work through this. Making a challenge, normal expected, and then focusing on what you're learning will help build that culture of mental toughness. The most mentally tough dancers don't avoid challenge. They seek it out because they know that's where they grow.

And finally the fourth C is confidence. This is the area most dancers want to grow and most struggle with. Simply put confidence is your belief in your ability. It's that deep internal knowing I can do this. Confidence doesn't mean you never feel nervous. It means you trust your preparation. So when you're nervous, you can have that thought, I've got this. I know what to do. You've done the work, you know you can perform even under pressure. You've prepared and you know you can handle the moment and be your best. .

This four Cs model of mental toughness brings up an interesting idea [00:13:00] related to confidence that there are actually two ways confidence shows up in a mentally tough dancer.

The first is self-belief as we've been talking about, trusting yourself, your skills, your preparation. But the second aspect of confidence is called interpersonal confidence. It's the ability to project energy, to lead, to inspire the dancers around you, especially on dance teams. It's not just about your ability to believe in yourself. It's also really valuable to be able to help the rest of your team feel confident in themselves.

Confidence is a skill. It's built through repetition, reflection, experience, pushing through challenge, and knowing you can do it. It's both about building your own confidence, but also about learning the skill of helping other people see themselves in a better light and inspire their confidence.

And while I've talked about confidence building a lot on the show, here are a few small ways you can build your mental toughness by focusing [00:14:00] on confidence. You can keep a win log every week. Write down one thing you did well in practice. One full out that felt great. One trick that hit one leadership moment, a correction, you applied quickly.

Then before your next performance or competition, read through your list. It's tangible proof you're putting in the work and you're ready. You can also visualize success. Spend a few minutes before practice seeing yourself perform with calm, energy, precision, and joy. Your brain doesn't always know the difference between imagined and real performances and your mental repetition can help build that confidence.

And finally, positively influence others. Confidence grows when you help other people. Volunteer to do something for your team or your coach. Hype up your team. Support someone who might be struggling with some individual attention. Every time you step up and try to positively influence others, you reinforce your [00:15:00] belief in your ability to make an impact.

Confidence isn't about perfection. It's not about believing everything you do will always be perfect. It's about trust. You're building trust in yourself, your team your preparation so you know you're ready to handle the moment in front of you.

Let's put it all together. The four Cs of mental toughness, control, commitment, challenge, and confidence are like muscles. You already have them, but they get stronger with consistent training. Control helps you stay grounded when life gets chaotic. Commitment keeps you showing up when motivation fades. Challenge fuels your growth through the hard stuff, and confidence lets you perform with joy and power when it counts.

If you want to become a mentally tough dancer, start by choosing one C to focus on this week. You can ask yourself, where are my strongest and which one could I improve? Just pick one. [00:16:00] Use one of the tips we talked about to build that skill. You don't need to overhaul everything. Start small Over time, you'll notice that you can handle more pressure, recover faster, and perform with more consistency.

Remember, mental toughness isn't about never feeling nervous or making mistakes or never feeling negative emotions. It's about showing up as your best self, even when you do feel nervous or scared or tired. And if this episode hit home for you, I'd love for you to check out my free competition confidence checklist.

Again, it's that quick practical guide helps you prepare mentally for your next performance. And it fits perfectly with this four Cs model that we talked about today. You can grab it at passion for dance podcast.com/checklist or find it in the link to the show notes. Thank you for listening and being a part of this community that believes in training, not just the body but our minds as well. Because I think you and I both know talent might get you on the stage, but mental toughness is what keeps us going, , and it's [00:17:00] what allows you to keep sharing your passion for dance with the world.

Thank you for listening to Passion for Dance. You can find all episode resources at passion for dance podcast.com and be sure to follow me on Instagram for more high performance tips at Doctor Chelsea dot Otti. That's P-I-E-R-O-T-T-I. This podcast is for passionate dancers and dance educators who are ready to change our industry by creating happier, more successful dancers.

I'm Dr. Chelsea and keep sharing your passion for dance with the world.